Update: Lenuta thinks that her Facebook page was hacked with “defamation” because a link to this blog was posted on one of her post. You gotta hand it to Radu, he’s good. Gaslighting his own mother into believing she was hacked? There is no defamation if everything written is the truth. Oy….
To know why he abuses women, you have to start with the first woman he loved — his mother.
I’ve had the pleasure of speaking to his mother, Lenuta some months ago. She was warm, kind, friendly, and eager to get to know me. She even sent me some photos of her heavenly cakes. She’s a wonderful baker and has a Facebook page for her cakes! Initially, we started speaking after I became worried about Radu’s growing depression and his inability to leave the house, even for fresh air. This was long before I realized that he was simply lazy, and not really depressed. Lenuta loves her son as most mothers do. She told me how she and her husband moved from Romania to give Radu a better life, but she couldn’t understand why he lost motivation. She still considers him her “genius” little boy, but he’s not her little boy anymore. He’s a man that has the ability to cause emotional, and maybe even possible physical harm to other women.
When I first met Radu, he and I spoke about our living conditions, he told me that his parents lived with him and this was something that he’d claim many times throughout the course of our relationship. In quite common for elderly parents to live with their adult children, so I never thought anything of it. Back when I thought he actually had a job, and not just an unpaid gig for GOT, I just sort of assumed he was just taking care of his parents. Later, I would find out that he wasn’t doing anything to help his parents financially, except the occasional yard work, and Lenuta did his laundry, prepared almost all of his meals, and paid all the bills, along with his father, Marius. He always acted as though she never really mattered to him, that she wasn’t important to him in any way.
Many nights I’d complain to him about his lack of respect for her. I told him that he needs to respect her because she loves him and only wants the best for him. Of course, he never wanted to listen. He’d always say “what for” when I ask him to treat her better. I’d remind him of my own troubled past with my mother. I’d tell him how he was lucky to have such a wonderful mother who ignored him laying around all day long doing nothing. But he doesn’t respect her. This was another warning sign that I should have left. A man that doesn’t respect his mother will never respect you as his girlfriend, wife or even his friend.
But where did it all start? His resentment for her began when he started to have issues in middle school. He was getting into a lot of trouble, being bullied, and his grades began to drop. He even told me a story once where he got into a fight with a kid and he beat him so badly that he thought he was going to leave this young boy with life-threatening injuries or even kill him. That’s when his downward spiral began he ended up leaving school. When I first met him, he told me he left school because he became sick and had back problems and was on bed rest, so he couldn’t go to school. Months later he would tell me that his father lost his delivery van and business, so he had to quit school and get a job to help his family out.
The story of why he left school was always muddy and changing and even when I compared the story with “Perry” she didn’t know what to believe either, as he gave her a few explanations as to why he left. But after leaving (for whatever reason) he never returned and has no plans to. He turned to video games to fill his days and to escape from his life. For over 10 years this would continue and throughout this time he’s had many online girlfriends. He would date them a few months, then discard them. I spoke with another girl he met in a game a few years back and she confirmed that he also discarded her and “broke” her heart. When I spoke to Lenuta, she said Radu was always angry at her, but she never knew the real reason for his anger.
He blames her for his failures in life. He said she did “nothing” when he was having problems in school, so despite having over 10 years to change his life on his own, he still blames her for something she cannot change. The woman that ensures he has a roof over his head and food to eat, he hates. Is his contempt for her the reason he hated me and “Perry” because we both wanted to help him and once loved him? He emotionally abused both of us, but did more damage to me when really his anger lies with his mother.
Yes, he’s a sexist that believes women are beneath men, but any woman who gets too close to him, who attempts to help him, or even wants better for him, he will emotionally abuse. He’ll verbally abuse you on Monday and tell you that he loves you on Tuesday. The sad reality is his mother will never hold him accountable for anything and she allows him to explain anyway everything, which is just him manipulating her. I grew up with brothers who were exactly like him, and eventually, their verbal abuse turned physical towards me and the women they were dating. My mother stood by and did nothing while my brothers hurt many women. His mother will do the same thing, despite the fact that her son has hurt so many women, she still thinks he’s a baby. Meanwhile, her “baby” is verbally abusing and bullying others online.
Like the women in Radu’s life, past and present, no one holds him accountable for his behavior and his abuse. I had to learn the hard way after he tried to destroy me mentally by gaslighting me and running mental experiments on me that were designed to destroy my sanity. In his words, he wanted me to see what I was doing wrong, even if that meant causing me severe mental distress that left me crying hysterically and physically shaking. Sadly, the reason her son behaves the way he does is because of her, which is what I’ve come to realize. She doesn’t want to believe that her baby boy bullies and abuses women.
She doesn’t have to pay attention to me or apologize for what Radu did or the harm he’s caused. She’ll continue to enable him, block everyone and everything out and pretend that there isn’t something severely wrong with her son. She will continue to ignore all the things her son does, but my blog will serve as a warning to others for the next 5, 10, or 25 years. I will NEVER forget what Radu Popovici did to me.
